The Brussels Mole: Rites of passage

Deutsch

By Niklas Helwig

Settling into a new city is never a smooth ride – especially when that city is Brussels.

Settling into a new city is never a smooth ride – especially when that city is Brussels, the bureaucratic heart of Europe. Transitions, as anyone will tell you, aren’t designed to be easy. As I discovered first-hand, the process of relocating to Brussels is laden with unexpected rites of passage. The city has lived through a tumult of transfers: the new EU Parliament convened last summer, and a new European Commission braces for its term amidst global challenges. There’s a palpable sense that it, too, is navigating similar trials.

When I first arrived from Finland, I believed my car registration would be a straightforward affair. Armed with paperwork and patience, I stepped into one of Brussels’ nineteen municipal offices, hoping to satisfy the Belgian authorities. Yet, I quickly encountered the infamous bureaucratic maze.

Lacking a Belgian identity number, I was told that car registration was impossible. Could I apply for one there, I asked? Yes, but only after cancelling an initial registration attempt with yet another office. Each step added layers of complication until my car’s status – and my enthusiasm – were left in limbo.

A share of real-world stumbles

As an expat, I recognize that my challenges are cushioned by privilege. Nevertheless, there’s something humbling about starting over in a new city. The quest to find your way in an unfamiliar system strips away pretences, forcing you to adapt and learn the idiosyncrasies of daily life. Real integration means navigating new experiences, like finding the right “yaourt” in the supermarket, muddling through customer service calls in French, and decoding the local banking system.

I’m not alone in facing Brussels’ initiation rituals. The incoming European Commission is undergoing its own rites of passage, marked by both practical and political challenges. I recently heard about a newly designated commissioner who, lost in the labyrinthine Berlaymont headquarters, had to be guided to her Directorate-General by a sympathetic staffer. That moment of getting lost is, in a way, symbolic; the European integration project may come with lofty ideals, but settling into the Brussels “bubble” requires its own share of real-world stumbles.

The more significant rite of passage, of course, lay in the just concluded marathon confirmation hearings in the European Parliament, a spectacle that blends political theatre with career-defining stakes. Political veterans like Kaja Kallas mastered this initiation ritual, knowing how to draw applause from the parliamentarians with her strong stance on Russia’s war on Ukraine, while diplomatically sidestepping more polarizing issues like the Middle East conflict.

The benefits of bureaucracy

Perhaps this year, with global challenges mounting and international relations frayed, these rites of passage for the new Commission feel particularly resonant. The changing political landscape, from potential seismic shifts in US politics to turbulence at home, demands that the new cohort find its footing quickly and steer the Union through choppy waters.

Here also lie the benefits of the often-bemoaned Brussels bureaucracy: While the Commissioners settle into their new portfolios, the machinery has been testing scenarios how the dynamic with a less friendly US administration will pan out. Amidst transformation, continuity is assured.

Oh, and about my car? I eventually registered it … in Germany. Perhaps it’s a gentle reminder of Europe’s enduring quirks. If it’s any omen, let’s hope it’s not that Europe, too, is on a one-way path to being “run” by Germany.

Niklas Helwig is a Leading Researcher at the Finnish Institute of International Affairs (FIIA), who no longer has to worry about winter tyres.

The Brussels Mole column is published in cooperation with Ulkopolitiikka, the Finnish Journal of Foreign Affairs. The original Finnish text can be found here.

Pictures: Moving lorry: NotrucksNolife [CC BY 2.0], via Flickr; portrait Niklas Helwig: FIIA [all rights reserved].